Times are tight, I’ll admit it. It has always been a challenge to make ends meet and it’s not any different for yours truly. Since this isn’t a paying gig, I have had to maintain some level of income to pay the bills. Sometimes it is easier and I make enough to only have to work part of the year. But mostly I am slogging through just like everyone else. Now don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against a hard day’s work – one might say I put the “Hard” into Hard Wo…, on second thought, let’s go with another turn of phrase: “Hard work and I are never strangers”. Yeah, that’ll play a bit better in Peoria.
Anyway, before I completely lose track of my point, I am obliged to work to pay the bills. I’ve always felt that the “bad guys” were just like us, except they figure they should be able to make money using their super powers. That invariably leads to doing it the easy way, and that slides quickly down to “shaved head and a cat” territory. You might think that, with all the good we do for society, we’d be paid by some level of charity or government subsidy. Well, originally I thought it could work out that way too. Who wouldn’t want to pay a few bucks a month to be sure that they had some level of protection for society? Much like universal health care, it sounds like just the ticket and everyone is behind it until they say “and you know you’ll have to pay for it”. Then, everyone is out for themselves. So be it. We do this because we have to, you know? If it was about the money I would definitely be turning down the less interesting gigs.
So, long story short, I need to get another job. My last one was lucrative, but the hours just didn’t jive well with having to fly off on a moments notice to keep evil doers in their stead. Plus, one of the guys in the Marketing Department was always trying to arm wrestle me for beers. I think it was just ’cause he wanted to hold hands, but that’s a whole other issue altogether. I’ve now been looking for something that will make me enough money, but give me the flexibility to “make my own hours”, as it were. And that is where I get stumped. ‘Flexibility’ is out there and ‘Good money’ too – but they seldom live together. On the plus side my needs are quite basic. I am never at my place, so I really only need a bed to sleep on, a place to keep my clothes, shower, and a microwave oven. You’d think I would eat better as a super hero, but you just don’t have time to shop and anything fresh just goes bad before you have a chance to eat it. I admit that I go out to eat way more than I should, or is even healthy, but convenience reigns in this profession.
On the more practical side of things, I have discovered several vocations that are right out due to one major issue or another:
Fast Food – It would seem like a no brainer. “Want fries with that?” is the requisite skill, but I just can’t fit into those standard company uniforms. They assume that “big” means “belly” and I have yet to come across a sleeve that doesn’t shred as soon as I lift my arm up. Plus it isn’t a living wage, even with my basic needs.
Pizza Guy – This had appeal the first time I tried it. On the plus side is that I could work when I wanted to, and you made tips over your base pay. I didn’t need a car and could deliver more pizzas an hour than pretty much the entire group combined. The problem was that I felt compelled to make quick work out of those that would order a dozen pizzas for someone named “Richard Hurtz” or some such and give a fake address. News Flash: I will find you and hurt you.
Anyway it was a problem.
Temp – This is what I’ve done plenty in the past, but it does require wearing a suit and tie every day and I only have the one suit and 3 ties (two of which were joke gifts from Gamma Girl). I usually am the butt of the office jokes and am never offered to join the group for drinks after work (not that I ever have time, but it would be nice to be asked once in a while). The gigs are pretty short and when I invariably have to miss a day or leave on a moments notice (and then get fired), I can always find another job in a day or two.
Bouncer – this seems great at first glance, but the hours coincide with when most nefarious acts are committed. So it becomes a decision of ‘bounce’ or ‘save the world’.
Anyway, I’m really just whining now. I’ll figure it out, but I’m gonna have to do it soon as I think my DSL bill is coming due and I just spent my last $30 on a new high tech green laser pointer.
Hey, the Wonder Cat loves it.